Who makes you angry?

If several names popped into your head just by reading the title of the post or if you have a scowl forming on your face right now, I've got news for ya... The answer to the question "Who makes you angry?" is (drumroll)..... you. (Wah, wah.)  Earlier this week our new escuela socia (partner public school) designed a strategic plan. One-fourth of the time that was allotted for strategic planning, however, was dedicated to examining the paradigms of our thinking, our resistance to or acceptance of change, and our ways of communicating. One questioned that emerged was "Who makes you angry?" The easy answer is 'She/he does!" but if we examine that emotion a little deeper, we find underneath it an initial sensation which based on our experience we then perceive a certain way.  We make ourselves angry.

Our body sends us warning signals of anger. Perhaps it is an upset stomach, a wrinkled forehead, a clenched jaw. Sometimes these warning signs go unrecognized, and in that case, by being angry the only person we are hurting is ourselves. What is your red flag? If we can identify it, then that anger doesn't have to wage war on our health--mental and physical--but we can work through it. We can breathe. We can try to open our minds, get more information, or look at the situation from another perspective... try and figure out why we feel threatened and if there is indeed a valid threat.

So...Storytime.  My family told me that on Maundy Thursday you can stay out all night in Antigua, walking around and watching families elaborate their alfombras.  I presented this idea to my friend, Maura, and after some discussion she says "We have to stay up all night!"  "Why is that, Maura?" I ask.  "Because that's what Jesus' disciples were doing on this night."  Love it.  Here we go.
 

I was waiting to meet up with Maura and grabbed a hot chocolate in the park when it started to sprinkle. As sprinkle turned to rain I decided to wait it out in the doorway of another coffee shop...my experience told me that it would be rude to take the competitor's coffee cup into their shop and sit sooo... as I walked in I just tried not to make eye contact!  haha.  I did notice a manager-type person looking my way every once in a while though.  And then another employee started walking my way.  Oh man.  I'm caught.  How embarrassing, I'm going to be told that I can't have this cup of coffee here, etc, etc.  The exchange went something like this:  (except in Spanish)

"Excuse me.  What are you drinking?"
"Come again?"  (As if I was surprised and didn't understand what he was asking.)
"Your drink... What are you having?"
"Hot chocolate..?..."  (Deep breath, preparing for the onslaught.)
"Would you like to try ours?.... I mean, may I bring you a cup of our hot chocolate?"
"Okay!"

A few minutes later

 
"What's your name?"
"Laura"
"It's for Laura!"
 
and then he brought me this! 
 
So, they could have gotten angry.  'Why is this gringa bringing in some other companies coffee and taking up a perfectly good lounge chair, taking away from our business?'  But I like to think that because they didn't react right away, they had time to consider all of the factors.  It's a special day, it is raining unexpectedly, cold, she is alone and obviously not at home, and what is one less sale of coffee really going to hurt us. They showed compassion.  They were welcoming. They turned a possibly threatening situation into an opportunity.  They let their paradigms of how their business works flex just a bit.  And I promise I will be going back to that coffee shop next time. 
 
What would happen if we showed the same receptiveness at church?  In meetings at work?  In our friendships and with our family members who are just a 'little off'?  Jesus did this well.  Slow to anger.  He
 showed love and forgiveness to the prostitute when she began to douse his feet in perfumes and wash then with her hair.  Everyone else would have recoiled from her touch.  And when Jesus called up "Zacchaeus, you come down from that tree", the hated tax collector probably had a similar reaction to mine in the coffee shop.  'Uh oh.. am I in trouble...'   But instead, theirs and many lives are transformed because of that love. 

Who makes you angry?

The Lord is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.—Psalm 145:8